Soft haze and the dreams a new day brings.
Category Archives: Random Thoughts and Feelings
Beauty to the Blind
I have often wondered what beauty looks like to a person who is blind. When a blind person says something or someone is beautiful, what exactly do they mean? Can they have the same point of reference as a seeing person has?
If I were to ask a hundred people what beauty is to them, I’d venture to say that most (not all) of them would describe some physical attribute that they find attractive. Not many describe inner beauty as something they find attractive. In fact, like the above picture implies, only fat (or ugly) people talk about inner beauty.
I guess Sophia Loren must have been pretty darn ugly since she believed that beauty generated from the inside and reflected to the outside. I wonder how a blind person would have seen Sophia Loren since he could neither experience her physical beauty or the beauty that shone through her eyes.
Almost all of us, except for the blind I suppose, are visual beings. Generally, sight is the first sense we use when we take in something or someone. For me, what makes someone attractive or unattractive is what I see after I take my first look. I have seen some physically beautiful people become more and more unattractive to me once they showed who they were inside. The same can be said about the unattractive person who became more and more beautiful the more I learned about them.
Don’t get me wrong. I don’t mind looking at man and growling at their exquisite form but truthfully the staying power is what is between their ears and in their heart. I don’t find too much attractive in anyone trying to conform to what I want them to do or be. I like when a person is his own man or woman. To me, being comfortable in your own skin is pure beauty.
Recently I had the opportunity to people watch at a few different agendas. While each agenda had its own different theme, all of them had one thing in common: people trying to attract other people by being beautiful. I saw women (young girls) walking in stilettos on uneven black top surfaces making their poor ankles bend and wobble while trying to keep them upright. I saw shirts that were tighter than any corsette. I saw shorts that were so short that a camel toe would have been a welcome sight. So many views of people trying to be beautiful and the saddest thing to see is the shows being presented was mostly by women trying to attract men. In the animal kingdom, it is the male who flashes the female with all his beauty, in the homosapien world, it is the female that is made to paint her face and dance.
Maybe my views have changed because I’m older. Perhaps my views have been tainted by working so many years in an Emergency Department where I have witnessed the self-destructive actions of young women because they did not seem to fit into the beauty ideal of society. Sex sells, and having indiscriminate sex sells the soul.
I like this warning. I wish that all people could see the truth in it. Allowing others to tell us what beauty is and is not is detrimental to our well-being and our self-esteem. It is allowing others to define us. I don’t want someone who doesn’t know me have a say in who I am.
View beauty like the blind man. He can only see with his heart.
Lazy, Lazy, Lazy
Time.
A non-renewable commodity.
I wasted time today.
I wasted the whole day doing absolutely nothing. What a shame.
Considering I have lived more of my life than I have left, I feel that I shouldn’t really waste any time. Every minute of my day should be filled with living life. Today, I feel I have failed in the accomplishment of that goal. I was lazy. Not just mildly lazy but extremely lazy. The hardest thing I did today was make several cups of tea. I didn’t eat breakfast, or lunch and I’m contemplating not eating dinner since the effort would be to great.
Thank goodness I don’t have many of these kinds of days.
Let Me Speak Up!
Although I am not very political by nature there are a few things that will make me stand up and shout out about man’s inhumanity to man. In my mind’s eye, there are a few things that shouldn’t even be on anybody’s political agenda because they are basic human rights. Just like the “black movement” shouldn’t have HAD to have been an issue back in the 60’s (and still exists), the “gay movement” shouldn’t HAVE to be an issue today. These things are just basic rights afforded to everyone: white, black, yellow, gay, straight, fat, skinny and all creeds.
Yesterday, I published the picture at the top of this post to my facebook account. Believe it or not, there was a person who was equally shocked by both pictures. I was shocked that she was shocked. I see a huge difference in children starving to death and two people expressing their love for one another. In a world filled with hate and inequality on all levels, I find it sad that anyone can find both pictures equally shocking. Even though her opinion differs from mine, it is still her basic right to express it.
In the not so distant past, it was considered a sin to marry someone outside of your religious faith. A Catholic marrying a Jew was about as controversial as one could get. People quoted the Bible by saying “God doesn’t want us to be unevenly yoked.” When the religious issue calmed down a little the marriage scene was scandalized once again. Oh my goodness, white people were marrying black people! How could we have gone so far down the social scale? Heaven forbid, God would never approve of this! It’s an abomination unto man! Whites cannot marry blacks, it says so in the Bible. “God doesn’t want us to be unevenly yoked.”
Once again, we have a marriage issue on the rise. Unlike the minor issues of murder, rape, hunger, war, child abuse, elderly abuse and the like, gay issues are of paramount importance and should be a major political agenda for everyone. Stopping gay people from holding hands in public, kissing in public, getting married in public and having sex in private is an issue all us of should be concerned with. World peace will follow once we eradicate the gays from having any rights. Hitler must have been right when he wanted to abolish the people that he found offensive and take away their rights. Is that not what we are doing on a smaller scale when we take away basic human rights from those whose ideals do not conform to ours, whose color is not the same as ours, whose religious belief is not the same as ours, or whose sexual preference is not the same as ours?
The Bible is being quoted once again. The “unevenly yoked” comment isn’t being spoken very loudly this time (I wonder if it’s because you can’t get to much more equal than the same sex), but Sodom and Gomorrah has reared it’s ugly head. What I remember from Sodom and Gomorrah is that Lot (a righteous man before God) offered up his daughters to the people of Sodom to have sex with (which was a sin because women were stoned to death for having sex out of marriage) so they would not rape (violently engage in sex with) the visitors that God had sent him. The men who wanted to have sex with Lot’s male visitors may have been homosexuals but above that they were rapist. To some, that is a small distinction; to me it is huge.
Don’t get confused now. I do not mean to imply that homosexuals are rapists, in fact more heterosexual males are rapist than homosexual males. I guess that fact could be a clear cut reason to abolish homosexual males which would then cut down on raping. Oh dear, the vicious cycle goes on and on.
Whenever I see inequality anywhere I hope I am strong enough to always speak out. May I never be the only one left standing. Pastor Martin Niemoller spoke these words for ALL mankind — those that conform to our ideas as well as those who do not.
First they came for the Communists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Communist
Then they came for the Socialists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Socialist
Then they came for the trade unionists
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a trade unionist
Then they came for the Jews
And I did not speak out
Because I was not a Jew
Then they came for me
And there was no one left
To speak out for me.
The “Con”
In 1970, Golden Gate Comic Book Convention was held for the first time in San Diego, California. Later, the Golden Gate Comic Book Convention gave way to the title San Diego Comic Book Convention which today is officially named Comic Con International: San Diego. Although the name Comic Con International: San Diego is the official name and the name attached to all the official logos, con-goers lovingly call it simply San Diego Comic Con or SDCC or simply Comic Con.
From what I’m told the original format of the convention was comic books in its purest form. Now the international format has branched out to include all sorts of “fan-doms.” I wonder if the group of San Diegans who formed the first Golden Gate Comic Book Convention knew that their love for comics would catch on like wild fire and infect entire nations. People from all over the globe scrimp and save their pennies to attend this once a year event.
So, how does an old woman like me know about Comic Con International: San Diego? Seven years ago my daughters decided to go on vacation together to San Diego to this “convention.” I didn’t have a whole lot of concerns seeing them off to San Diego together to a “little” convention in sunny California. I expected they would have fun on the beach, in the ocean or sight-seeing when the their tiny convention got a little boring. What I didn’t expect was to see a picture plastered on AOL of my daughter sleeping in front of the San Diego Convention Center. I stared at the picture for what seemed like hours but I’m sure it was only a few minutes.
“Is that her? No, it can’t be! That IS her! You’ve got to be kidding. What in the heck? Oh my God, what in the world is she thinking? All those people around her are strangers. She could be killed.” Ah yes, a mother’s thoughts go immediately to the dark side when she perceives her offspring to be in danger. I looked at the picture again, this time smiling as I recalled the many times I did things that my mother would have considered foolish or dangerous.
Their arrival home was filled with chatter: what they did, who they saw, how many people were there, how the people were dressed, what panels they saw. They spoke incessantly of all the things I knew nothing about. The one thing I did hear them say is that they were going again next year and immediately the AOL picture flashed in my mind.
Comic Con 2012 will begin July 12th with the all-important preview night beginning the 11th of July. I can only assume the population of San Diego will swell to unprecedented proportions. The cost of basic hotel rooms will raise to $800.00 per night (no exaggeration) and they will all be filled with convention goers. Restaurants will re-name their meals and drinks to “Batman Burgers” or “The Force Shakes” and people will be dressed in outlandish costumes representing their favorite fan-doms. The Convention Center will be at capacity. As with every big Convention, there will probably be little “side bars” of people who hold similar interests and will meet up to discuss what they like and don’t like about a particular comic, or show, or fan. Perhaps new friendships will spawn from across the globe. Boats, jets and the internet have made this world a very small place.
What am I looking forward to when it comes to Comic Con? I wish I could say that I am looking forward to it being over so the Comic Con Conversation can stop; but I know even after the event the conversation continues. Once 2012 Comic Con International is put to bed, 2013 Comic Con will be sleepily raising her head.
The one priceless thing about Comic Con? The joy in eyes of my child at her excitement.
It Didn’t Come Out Easy
I don’t like using public restrooms. I only use public restrooms when I’m desperate or I’m traveling. I was not traveling today. I used the public facilities at a local restaurant which means my use was due to the former and not the latter.
I am ignorant when it comes to using public restrooms. When I enter, the only thing I
really check over well is the cleanliness of the place. If the facility is too bad, I suck it up and “hold it” until I either get home or get to a place that I can tolerate. Not checking the room prior to use can be a big mistake so I assume most frequent users probably check to make sure there is running water, soap to wash your hands, towels to dry your hands, toilet seat covers, and toilet paper. If I were a frequent user these would be the things I would check; but since I leave my use to travel or desperation, I generally don’t take the time to check.
Today was no different than other times I’ve used a public facility. I had waited too long and the necessity of my use was eminent; my bladder had been stretched to capacity. I excused myself politely from the lunch table and hurried off to the restroom hoping that it was one that I could use fairly comfortably. I pushed the swinging door open and scanned the room quickly. All looked well. There wasn’t a terrible odor, the floor was clean and dry, and the sinks looked clean. Perfect!
I pushed my way into the single stall, ripped a cover from it’s holder, placed it strategically on the seat and sat down quickly. The familiar heart encircled “Johnny loves Sue” was written on the back of the door for everyone’s viewing pleasure along with a few “Repent now; the end is near” slogans.
It didn’t take me but a few minutes to read the back of the door and prepare to leave; however, my departure was delayed by the toilet paper dispenser. Thank goodness there was toilet paper in the holder (which I hadn’t taken the time to check before I sat down to read the back of the door). There were, in fact, two brand new rolls of toilet paper pressed so tightly together that I could only pull the paper out in very small pieces.
So there I sat, pulling the toilet paper out bit by bit, tiny piece by tiny piece wishing for more wit to read on the back of the bathroom door.
Views of Independence
Did You Call?
I do not live with my cell phone attached to me. In fact, there are times when I forget my phone at home when I am out and about running errands. I know this may be a major shock to most people, but I don’t find it necessary to turn around and travel back home to pick up my phone to have it next to me. There are very few messages important enough that can’t wait until I get home to retrieve them. Of those messages that are of the utmost importance, I find that there is very little I could have done to change the outcome even if I had my cell phone attached to my hip.
I do not need my cell phone with me when I am eating dinner. I do not need to hold my cell phone lovingly in my left hand while eating dinner with my right. I do not need to take a bite of my food and listen while my phone beeps, buzzes or tweets to see what is happening with my family or friends. I’m not sure, but I think that most of what the people I know does can wait until I see them in person for them to tell me directly. I’m not sure, but I’m willing to risk it. I like living on the edge.
I do not need my cell phone to tell everyone I know what I am doing or thinking. I don’t think my life holds that much importance for everyone to know where I am, what I’m doing or what I’m thinking. Maybe I like a little intrigue in my life; an element of mystery that makes me not want to bellow to the minions what I’m about; or maybe if the general population knew what I was thinking I’d have a permanent home in an asylum.
I do not carry my cell phone so I can carry on a conversation via text message. I’m not going to fight, apologize or make solid plans via text message. The intonation and expression is lost in the 160 characters I have to explain to anyone what I want, need, am sorry for or excited about. I’m inclined to think that many a good relationship could be ruined by a text message. In a world of cold and impersonal attitudes towards mankind, I can’t think of anything that can express that better than a conversation held via text messages.
Please, don’t get upset with me because I didn’t answer my cell phone right away 
when you called or I didn’t get back to you until early evening or the following day. It is probably because I forgot my cell phone at home or decided to run errands without it.
Please, don’t get upset with me because I don’t respond to your the buzzes, beeps and tweets to my cell phone. I’m probably eating a meal; and I don’t answer any phone during meal time with family or friends. If I’m not eating dinner, I might not answer my phone because its buried deep in my purse and I don’t hear it. I am not so in tuned to my phone that I can hear it in any situation.
Please, don’t be alarmed or think I am excluding you from a friendship if I don’t respond immediately to your text message. If I see the message on my phone, it was probably sent 2 hours ago which means I have to call you to apologize for not getting right back to you.
Communication by way of advanced technology is at our fingertips. We can reach out and touch others as we never have been able to before. We can connect to others in our home town and across the world. We can communicate to the nations and still leave mankind cold.
I’m sorry I didn’t answer my cell; please call my land line!
Shampoo, Lather, Rinse, Repeat
Amazingly, the directions on a shampoo bottle, no matter how expensive that shampoo may be, have changed very little. “Wet hair, apply shampoo, lather, rinse and repeat” has been the mainstay of many a shampoo product. I like those directions. They are simple and too the point; as all directions should be.
In years past, television equipment came with the same basic instructions. “Plug television into a grounded receptacle, locate the on/off switch (which came with a picture) and turn the television on. Later, television instructions became a little more complicated as the advent of cable became a stable in many homes. Once again, the instructions were basic and for the most part easy to follow but you might have had to follow instructions in two booklets not one: the cable booklet and the television booklet. The instructions still came in the same box that the television or cable box came in and it had pictures and diagrams for all to follow.
Of course, if you were a music enthusiast, the instructions to connect tuners, amplifies, cassette tape decks, reel-to-reels, turntables and speakers put you far above those lowly consumers who only assembled their television and cable boxes. Diagrams, speaker wires and channels were a part of the common vocabulary when it came to assembling the perfect in-house stereo systems. “Real” stereo geeks laughed at the purchase of the all in one stereo systems that doubled as a piece of furniture. Even after the stereo/furniture became a thing of the past and progress was made to put all the components of a stereo in one, the geeks still turned up their nose to the advancement. Good thing these geeks had a firm foundation in components because the worst was yet to come.
Oh no they didn’t. They combined television and music! Say it isn’t so! As technology evolved the television combined with surround sound. Stereophonic TV. The idea appealed not only to the television enthusiast but the stereo snob as well. “Live” sound emanating from a visual source was more than anyone could refuse. The connection war was on for all to enjoy – or not enjoy – as the case may be.
The instruction pamphlets turned into instruction booklets. Each component: television, receiver, tuner, CD player, DVD player, Nintendo, speakers each had their own booklet and each had their own idea on how things had to be connected. Getting a new component meant a weekend project; complete with assemble, test the new component, disassemble, re-assemble, test the new component with a whole lot of swearing in the mix. God forbid if you bought an entire new system complete with the latest and greatest gaming system. Assembly of such proportions may have taken a couple of weekends and a few week night which gave you about 2 weeks to learn how to use the remote (which, by the way, comes with its own instruction booklet).
Surround sound gave way to 5 way surround sound which eventually was ousted by 7 way surround sound; each upgrade giving more and more of a live experience until eventually one could fantasize that they were at the premiere of the show they were watching or maybe even at the theater itself. Life couldn’t get much better. What more could the consumer want? Why wouldn’t anyone want to convert their weekends and a few of their week nights into assembling one of the most prime entertainment systems ever? Of course, after the assembly was perfected a new, much better, product hit the market and only left you wanting.
Fear not. The makers of all our components heard the pleas of the common man and decided to thin those thick instruction manuals down to a pamphlet once again. Of course, the pamphlet only contains the website one needs to assess in order to download the manual that contains 3,652 pages of words and diagrams each separated into its own unique topic that refers you to a later page or an earlier page that you didn’t understand anyway.
There are other options to the instruction manual nightmare. Hire someone. Hiring someone only takes one weekend-day (but you may have to wait for months for an appointment) or take a vacation day from work and spend the morning watching someone install your easy-to-assemble entertainment system and spend the afternoon in class while he teaches you how to use it.
Technology has made my life much more simple. I am so glad we have advanced beyond those silly instructions of shampoo, lather, rinse, repeat.
You Treat Me Like a Dog!
I wish someone would treat me like a dog. I look at my three dogs and think they have got to have the best life of anyone I know. They get their hair done every 6 weeks. They don’t have to shower every day but get bathed when they need it. They don’t have to brush their own hair; someone else does that for them. They get their ears scratched and their backs rubbed more in one day then I do in a year. They get to run naked outside. They get taken to their doctors at regular intervals and don’t have to worry about the bill. What more could anyone want? Please, treat me like a dog!
One more thing. Have you ever heard of a dog who had to clean up human poop? I don’t think I have; but I have heard of many people cleaning up dog poop.
Silent Screams (and other odd sounds) 